West London Girl

5 signs you have adult perspectives


‘If you’re going through hell, keep going’

Like all worthwhile things, organising a post relationship fling often requires a bit of effort (particularly when you don’t want to resort to Tinder).

If you want to stick to better-the-devil-you-know, there’s always Facebook Messenger. Which is just how one guy got in touch… ‘So what’s happened in the last three years?’ I asked.
‘I’ve grown up,’ said the younger-than-me Tennis Player.

Which made me wonder if I have grown up at all. When I last thought about it (1.5 years ago, after signing a work contract), I came to the conclusion I hadn’t grown up. My mum still looks after my cat and I have little – correction: no – savings, but perhaps there are some other ways to measure adulthood:

  1. You accept what is beyond your control
    The decision makers at work pass you over for promotion or a pay rise. Instead of stamping your feet and saying, ‘That’s not fair’ to anyone who will listen, you learn when not to sweat the small stuff and when to pick your battles.
  2. You realise what you really want
    We usually stop sweating the small stuff when we know what the big stuff is. Which sometimes means letting go of a relationship because he doesn’t want/does want kids and you do/don’t.
  3. You appreciate the small stuff
    Of course a walk in the park isn’t to everyone’s liking but the small things, which usually involves spending time with friends or in nature, become our big indulgences.
  4. You think twice
    You have enough experience to know that too much partying today steals the fun from tomorrow; you may regret the things said in anger; it’s best to walk away when someone goads you into confrontation; and to know the value of generosity of spirit.
  5. You know the value of doggedness
    To succeed in business, you don’t necessarily have to be the smartest person in the room, but the one who perseveres. As Winston Churchill famously quipped, ‘If you’re going through hell, keep going.’

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