James wasn’t impressed by last week’s blog. He left a (swiftly deleted as it undermined the anonymity of the blog) comment referring to me as a bunny boiler. All things considered, it didn’t seem the most appropriate put-down yet its sexist connotations angered me. It reminded me of the Actor who called me crazy when I cancelled the third date. Having had a few days to become less unhinged, I thought I’d prepare some comebacks for those regular sexist put-downs when the (mini-)relationship doesn’t work out…

Him: Good thing I don’t own a bunny
Future me: Good thing I own a Rampant Rabbit

Him: You’re crazy
Future me: I would say that my reality is just different to yours

Him: You have three failed engagements
Future me: Engagements are supposed to be broken

Him: You’re too thin for me (admittedly I haven’t heard this one for a few years)
Future me: You’re too thick for me

Him: You’re too intimidating
Future me: I’ve been thinking that now we’ve reached our third date, I could quit my job and become your live-in cleaner/cook/whatever

Him: You’re spoilt/too high maintenance
Future me: Really? I do hope so

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